September 28, 2023
I don’t know when I started to get into football.I know when I wasn’t. Thanksgiving as a child, wondering why we weren’t talking and instead staring at a TV full of strangers. Whistles and flags, colors on green, cheers and jeers with my family’s (the men) loud laughter, loud clapping, loud boos. Mom cooking all by herself so I did what I could, wishing we all would work together to make it more efficient and fair.
Ah, yes, I remember when I always wanted things to be fair…
Now I just want it to be quiet (unless I’m making the noise) and I just want everyone to be nice (unless I’m ready to fight) and I just wish everyone would leave me alone (unless I’m willing to be tangled).
I know it was Favre. When he did AND when didn’t suck. Hee was heaven to watch. He’d break his neck on the ground to see if the ball was caught. He was all heart. Yeah, he made some big mistakes but that’s what happens when you love something that much.
Hell, that’s what happens when you’re human.
You fumble, you lose, you get mad, you get emotional. And you get to go through it in front of the world!! What you should have or could have done is replayed in front of you like a nightmare and a lesson. Your life, televised.
Or you win and you’re still picked apart by someone.
I don’t think I do the winning part, mostly. I make little, tiny strides in the right direction but my heart guides me in all sorts of ways I don’t believe is “correct” by everyone’s definition. I feel like a majority fuck up. I do try. I truly do but my heart and my mind and my logic gets jumbled too easily. I want what I want but I want others to be happy and I hate disappointing so they all collide into a perfect storm.
Unfortunately, I don’t have the balls to go play for the Vikings. To take the chance, late in my career, to be booed by fans who loved me a moment ago, despite never knowing if there will BE another chance again. I feel like retirement is my calling anyway. Give up, give in, walk on, walk away…
Your true passion compares to mine Brett.
You just wanted to be.
That’s literally all I want.
As long as it’s my way…