April 16, 2021
It won’t be because of the ATVs I’ve lifted up, ass end, to move them about on the showroom floor. It won’t be because of the Gold Wings I’ve put to sleep, pushing them backwards, up a slight incline, perhaps a few a day. Carrying heavy pier tiles resurrected each spring and laid down in anticipation of Das Boat. Sitting like a pretzel on a bar stool. Whiplash from car accidents, dislocated everythings, age…Nope.
My rounded shoulders, crowning into a giant HUMP on my back, will be solely dedicated to the endless hours spent leaning over a bed, sorting tiny fucking socks.
Little boy socks with raccoons. Pink princess socks with glitter. My 8-year-old’s outgrown socks. Puma no show socks. The occasional, “Whose socks are these?!” might add an extra bit of tension and take away a couple of extra years but they’re my dad’s or my brother-in-law’s or WHATEVER so we’re square.
If I cannot stand up straight, it’s because of socks. If I’m short with you, it’s probably because I cannot find socks. If you need socks, I can’t help you, because I have only cleaned MY socks in retaliation to more laundry. If I scowl at you in the dead of the afternoon with a drink in my hand and a slump in my frame… don’t worry about the socks, just bring me more booze. If I yell ferociously at you, it’s because you have socks currently laying on the living room floor where they DO NOT belong. If I hate you, it’s because you deserve it, so find your fucking socks and put on your fucking shoes and walk away. For a good while at least.
2022 will be the year of socks.
One of you will own only blue socks. One of you will own only red socks. One of you will have hand-me-down socks that I don’t mind sorting because your feet are still baby feet and nibble-worthy so you can’t really do any wrong until you’re at least two years older.
But then you will be designated green socks.
The Dance: Garth Brooks
Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared 'neath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye
And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end, the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance
Holding you, I held everything
For a moment wasn't I the king
If I'd only known how the king would fall
Hey, who's to say, you know I might have changed it all
And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end, the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance
If our lives are better left to chance
Oh, our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance