September 14, 2022
I saw my old neighbor from the ‘rents’ place on the lake. His grandparents gave him that house 20 years ago or more but when he had a falling out with his wife, he moved out. He was planning to sell the house once things were rolling but that didn’t settle well with me so I connected him with one of my friends who was a lawyer at the time. This is a no fault state and so anything he was gifted, remains his and is not up for division in the case of a divorce. He allowed his ex-wife and kids to remain in the house until the three girls graduated high school. Recently, he has moved back in.“This calls for a few cheers with some beers, Bruce!” I said, stomping across the back yards attempting to avoid Great Dane bombs.
Really good to see that smile and hear that laugh and know my ‘rents have someone watching out for them. I met his wife (she might be younger than one or more of his kids), his small ponies, his brother and his niece. Delightful bunch. Definitely plan to pop over again and catch up more but his story wasn’t all sunshine and crushed cans.
None of his children will speak to him. He tried to go to therapy with them all to work on things but they made demands/conditions which he could not abide by. His youngest is pregnant now, prior to finishing school, and the remaining two are in their 20’s now. I recall them as tiny humans mostly and I remember the youngest just learning to walk. She was a spitfire then and I suspect quite the same still.
I wonder if all that could be me.
Kids don’t get it until they have kids. I certainly didn’t get it. But, then again, I kind of did…
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You dim my light
And I am defeated
Pretending to feel something I don’t
Carrying on as though I will but I probably won’t
Set me in a different room and just try to scrape the smile from my face! Getting my ass kicked in Boot Camp! Falling on my face on skates! At a loud bar, a quiet place, a sunny deck or a wintery romp in the snow.
Something has to give because I’m scared to stay and afraid to leave and the only alternative that doesn’t scare me is the one that probably should the most.