February 20, 2008
You will be pleased to know that I have very recently been bestowed with the power to dim the world at will.Ah, yes, indeed you read that correctly -- I am now the proud owner of the ability to cast shadows upon this great earth with a mere inclination.
How might this miracle have occurred? Well, gentle reader, allow me a moment to explain...
I was simply setting up my tripod in order to garner steadier shots of the lunar eclipse when I noticed my camera was picking up the back ground light from the city and street lights. I began to grumble (as most do when natural light does not bend to a photographer's frenzy) when, lo! the space outside my window fell black! A gentle request was all it took. An effortless suggestion on behalf of my Canon and the effulgence was whisked away. The street lights, the city lights, the building lights -- poof! Gone.
Oh yes -- I, too, was astounded initially but who can question the influence of a great mind coupled with a modest ambition? The photos had to be taken, the moon was shrinking away, my hands were growing less steady with every drink, the moment of truth had come! And, in an instant, my wish for dark purity was answered.
What use such a divine endowment might hold for future instances is quite entirely unknown but, for now, it's pretty damned cool.
'Tis but a power outage, you say, which can easily explain this ever-so-sudden black plague. Perhaps the city forgot to pay its electric bill or, you might think, this was all carefully planned so that casual onlookers could partake in the viewing of this splendid eclipse. You are wrong. This is not a mere technical error. There are no officials in this city powerful enough to command such a grand gesture. And, even if there were, I prefer to believe otherwise.
I prefer to think of myself as an omnipotent god.
Yes.
God.