June 09, 2005
He asked me, "What does this feel like to you?"And I replied, while lying in his arms in absolute serenity, that to me it felt like perfection. Not that I would know exactly how to define the idea of perfection, but when there is nothing left to want in the world, even if it's only for a moment, I consider that pretty darn close.
Without looking up, I inquired of him the same question and his answer provoked the soft, slight hairs upon my back to stand up at attention.
"Home," he said in half a breath.
I melted deeper into the dark night that surrounding our two bodies, deeper into the pillow top mattress and deeper into the arms that enveloped me with protection. I wanted nothing more than to remain there forever, with the impact of his reply still clinging in the air and that feeling of simple perfection swelling in my chest.
Our tired hearts eventually found repose and we drifted on through that good night.
In the morning, as consciousness began to tug gently upon our eyes, we reached out for each other as the sun reached out for us. Again began the gentle touching, the inescapable smiles which grew from one corner of our mouths and the lingering kisses placed upon any area of uncovered skin. Through the darkness and into the daylight, a stretch equal to less than six hours, and I knew I had fallen even harder.
The clock upon my dresser seemed to show no mercy toward our desire to remain entangled and I bemoaned the moment that I would have to be released from his hold. And so it is with every moment that I cannot take the leisure of caressing his soft skin or the freedom to relish in my reflection in his eyes. The girl who once could not so easily sleep in any bed with another person present has somehow switched to being the girl who cannot imagine the night without him there. The girl who was so sure that passion would never take her ever again has found herself mistaken and encompassed with the most brilliant and innocent of realities. The girl has found herself in love.
This 'place,' my apartment, which I had never considered much of a home before, was beginning to feel just like that...
A home wherein perfection breathes.