Bent Words

Bent Words

May 31, 2006

My dearest Plopphizz tagged me with a request to describe six weird things/habits about myself nearly a week ago now. I keep forgetting to git her done, as you jackass Rednecks would say, but I just found a little bit of time here at work and thought I would FINALLY share a few of my idiosyncracies.

1. I am irrationally afraid of ticks. I am usually convinced that if it crawls and it's smaller than my nose, it's a tick. Spiders, lady bugs, little small rocks...

Probably a tick.

Not only is it likely to be a tick, it also has a good chance of carrying Lime's Disease. No one wants Lime's Disease and thus no one wants a virulent little blood sucking creepy crawly embedded into their face, so perhaps it's not as much of an irrational fear as I thought. But the fact that I blame small rocks for harboring malicious intentions probably is...

2. Toothpaste chunks in the sink piss me right off. I mean, what's the deal with that? If you have that much left over that you can spit out a CHUNK into the sink, you're not brushing those teeth right. You're gonna get gum disease and your teeth are going to fall out and all you're going to have to show for it is a now hard, blue mass in your once white sink.

Stop being stupid people and help rid the world of plaque and paste chunks. Thanks.

3. I cannot stand to see fingernails breaking off in the movies. Think, Silence of the Lambs or that movie with Kevin Bacon (dead girl in basement, right?) It makes my butt cringe like MAD to even think about it and it's making me want to tuck my fingernails into my fist so as to prevent any freak, sign of fate, occurrances. Bleghhh.

4. When I miss someone who is no longer in my life (i.e. dead), I sometimes snap my fingers and say their name (when I'm alone and no one's listening) with the intent to chat with said person. I feel that the person can hear me and know what I'm thinking. Kinda like calling someone up on the old cell phone, but without the roaming charges. It's silly, but this is supposed to be a weird list so bugger off if you don't like it...

5. I see dead people.

6. I write on my bathroom mirror with those eraser board markers. As though it weren't enough that I own seven different color sticky note pads, three notebooks which are always open, loose leaf paper and a marker board on my front door, I have to go and write on my stupid bathroom mirror.

I love writing on my bathroom mirror. It's kinda like doing what you're not supposed to -- without the consequence.

There's more, but I should probably get back to work.

But now I really need a smoke break... Write again after Road America!!!

LEJ

Written at 6:19 p.m.